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| Miscellaneous... And Then Some New perspectives, Law of Attraction... And Then Some! |
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Dear Mom and Dad: Lives and then some
by Richard L. Weaver II, PhD
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Dear Mom and Dad: Lives and then some
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A fourth grade perspective on the world
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Gifts that keep on giving
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Reasons why the Law of Attraction (LOA) is a myth
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The first anniversary of posted essays
A fourth grade perspective on the world
by Richard L. Weaver II, PhD
And Then Some Works (ATSW) had the
privilege of interviewing Skyler (not his real name), and what follows are
the questions asked and Skyler’s answers — a world perspective as seen
through the eyes of a highly intelligent, motivated, and enthusiastic fourth
grader.
ATSW: How do you like school?
Skyler: I like it a lot; I really love school.
ATSW: Why do you like school so much?
Skyler: Because it’s very fun, and you learn new stuff every day.
ATSW: What is the best thing you like about school?
Skyler: I like “Reading Excells.” (The special class for exceptional
readers.)
ATSW: What is so special about “Reading Excells”?
Skyler: We do a lot of experiments after we read a book. Like, after reading
“Chasing Vermeer,” we did an experiment about how the eye sees things
backwards. Also, after reading the book we all wrote riddles.
ATSW: If you could change anything at all about school to make it better for
you, what would you change?
Skyler: I would have “Reading Excels” every single day. Right now we only
have it once every two weeks. I would also have far more silent reading. I
like reading at school because you have to be quiet. Everyone has to be
quiet, and I love to read when it’s quiet. Also, I love math and science.
ATSW: Think about your life and all the things that you do: What do you like
to do the most?
Skyler: I like to play outside with my next-door-neighbor — in addition to
reading. Reading is my all-time-favorite thing to do.
ATSW: What is your favorite genre of book?
Skyler: Fiction.
ATSW: What kind of fiction do you like?
Skyler: Historical fiction. I also like adventure stories.
ATSW: Who is your favorite author?
Skyler: His name is Andrew Clements. He wrote “A Week in the Woods” and “Frindle.”
ATSW: Why do you like Andrew Clements?
Skyler: Because you can really get into the story and feel like you’re
inside it. Also you can feel the same problems the main character is facing.
ATSW: If you could do anything at all to change your life to make it better
for you, what would you change?
Skyler: I would be home schooled?
ATSW: Why would you want to be home schooled?
Skyler: Because I would be taught based on how I learn and not based on how
everyone else learns.
ATSW: Why would that make any difference?
Skyler: I feel like I’m being held back because all the smarter kids are
affected by the speed of learning of the other students. I would love to be
able to learn at my own pace.
ATSW: What do you think is the most important thing that makes people get
along with each other?
Skyler: Respect.
ATSW: Why do you think respect is so important?
Skyler: Because if you don’t respect one another you will be fighting all
the time.
ATSW: Do you have a second thing that you consider important?
Skyler: Yes. Always telling the truth would be my second choice.
ATSW: In all the world today and with all you’ve experienced up to now, what
is the thing about this world that surprises you the most?
Skyler: I used to think that all adults are perfect, and obviously they are
not. There have been adults who have disappointed me.
ATSW: If you could be anything you could be, and there was nothing stopping
you, what would you love to be?
Skyler: I would love to be a reading specialist in the public schools.
ATSW: Why does being a reading specialist interest you?
Skyler: Because I could work with children who are not as privileged as I
am.
ATSW: What do you think is the major thing in our society that seems to hold
people back or that keeps people from fulfilling their dreams?
Skyler: When I sit around and talk with my friends, we all are very excited
about what we want to do. We never talk about things that might hold us
back.
ATSW: Okay, what do you think holds kids back?
Skyler: Being scared is one thing.
ATSW: Being scared of what?
Skyler: Kids are probably scared of other kids being mean to them. Other
kids who call them nerds. So they don’t work as hard as they would otherwise
to avoid being called nerds.
ATSW: Any other things you can think of that might hold kids back?
Skyler: People have their dreams, but they decide it’s too much work. Seeing
how much they have to do, they give up on school.
ATSW: What do you think is the scariest thing in the whole world?
Skyler: Living behind someone’s shadow.
ATSW: What do you mean living behind someone’s shadow?
Skyler: Like being in the shadow of a very smart person. When you feel you
are not as smart as that person, it is a very scary thing.
ATSW: How do you mean that?
Skyler: Always, no matter what you are doing, there is always somebody
better than you are. They could do anything to me, and I wouldn’t have
anything to defend myself with.
ATSW: What is it that makes you the happiest?
Skyler: Being with my family.
ATSW: And why does it make you so happy?
Skyler: Because you know that everybody knows you and cares for you and
loves you for who you are and not for who they want you to be.
ATSW: What is it that makes you sad?
Skyler: When families aren’t together, or when families are fighting.
ATSW: Do you keep up with any news that’s going on in the world today? What
is a piece of news that you’ve heard?
Skyler: Recycling. The green-house effect.
ATSW: Where did you hear about these?
Skyler: I heard about them at school and on television.
ATSW: If you were king of the whole world and you could change one or two
things that would make the world a better place for everyone, what would you
change?
Skyler: I would stop having wars — with everyone peaceful
ATSW: And what would be a second thing you would change if you were king?
Skyler: I would have nobody litter or pollute the air.
ATSW: Would you ever want to be president of the United States?
Skyler: (He really had to think about this question. He wasn’t sure. He sat
and he thought, and thought, and thought. Finally, he responded.) No.
ATSW: You wouldn’t want to be president?
Skyler: No, there is so much pressure being president, and there will always
be people who don’t like you and don’t want you to be president.
ATSW: Would you ever want to go into politics?
Skyler: I would want to go into the House or Senate.
ATSW: Why would you want to go into the House or Senate?
Skyler: Then I could help make the country a better place.
ATSW: If you could go to any country in the world, what would it be?
Skyler: I would want to go to a very poor country and help out. A country,
for example, in South or Central America that is very small and very poor
where I could help them.
ATSW: If you could do one thing that would help a lot of people — where you
could make a significant contribution to our society — what would it be?
Skyler: Child hunger.
ATSW: And how would you help with child hunger?
Skyler: I would earn money by working, and then I would buy food and donate
it to child shelters — or places that don’t have much money.
ATSW: Are you thinking of going to college?
Skyler: Yes, definitely.
ATSW: And what would you like to study in college?
Skyler: I would like to study English. Also, I would want to become a
teacher.
ATSW: Did you enjoy this interview?
Skyler: Yes, I did. (He answered very enthusiastically.)
ATSW: And why did you like this interview so much?
Skyler: Because the questions were not normal, everyday questions.
ATSW: Not normal, everyday questions?
Skyler: Yes. The questions made me think.
If you thought for one minute that fourth graders are too young to have
hopes and dreams, are too young to have some idea of what is going on in
this world, or are too young to want to give back to society, then this
interview with Skyler should be an eye opener. As noted in the opening
paragraph, this is a young man who is eager, enthusiastic, motivated, and
interested in becoming a responsible, contributing, worthwhile member of
society. These are precisely the students whom all of us should be
encouraging through our patience, care, nurturing, and, above all else,
support. It is students like Skyler who will make it make a difference that
they have lived, and everyone will not only know, but appreciate, the
difference they have made.
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Dear Mom and Dad: Lives and then some
>
A fourth grade perspective on the world
>
Gifts that keep on giving
>
Reasons why the Law of Attraction (LOA) is a myth
>
The first anniversary of posted essays
Gifts that keep on giving
by Richard L. Weaver II, PhD
One of the most memorable Christmas
gifts my wife and I received last year was a CD a relative put together from
his collection of classical music he enjoyed listening to the most. When we
played his CD we were not only impressed, but we could easily understand why
he liked the music and why he thought others might enjoy it as well. We have
played the CD many times since receiving it — truly a gift that keeps on
giving.
This time of year causes most everyone to rack his or her brain in search of
“the perfect gift” for friends and family. Even when you find a present that
seems right, you run the risk of just giving more unwanted clutter. And, if
you’re like we are, there is more than enough of that! The other
possibility, of course, is that there is someone on your list for whom any
run-of-the-mill gift won’t do. Then what?
It doesn’t take much imagination to buy handkerchiefs, ties, and electronic
games at the mall or the nearest big-box store. These are the kinds of gifts
that fulfill our obligation to exchange presents, but they don’t speak from
the heart like some of the gifts of love that follow. There are numerous
possibilities.
For those of you reading this who might be concerned about having fewer
pretty, wrapped gifts under the tree, there is no reason why any of the
following possibilities could not be wrapped just like any other gift, with
an appropriate description and explanation boxed within.
I have divided these gift alternatives into three groups: donations,
preserving family (or friendship) images, and gift certificates.
Donations
To make a donation on another’s behalf to an organization that helps others
all year long is to give a gift that keeps on giving, and here are some
possibilities. Architecture for Humanity provides architects around the
world with opportunities to create environmentally sustainable temporary
shelters in developing and disaster-stricken countries (www.architectureforhumanity.
org). America’s Wetland: Campaign to Save Coastal Louisiana seeks to reverse
75 years of wetland deterioration along Louisiana’s coastline and barrier
islands. This is a habitat for over 5 million migratory waterfowl (www.americaswetland.com).
Other sources for potential donations include Heifer International. It helps
families around the world by providing the tools, supplies, and training to
plant trees, keep topsoil in place on farms, grow fruit for food, and
provide firewood for cooking and heat in winter. Also, it raises livestock,
donates animals to poor families, and educates communities on how to sustain
agrarian economies in an effort to alleviate world hunger and promote
environmental health and sustainability (www.heifer.org).
Trickle Up provides seed capital for start-ups or expansions and business
training to women especially, from Niger to the U.S.A. (www.trickleup.org).
Throughout Africa, Keep A Child Alive provides HIV/AIDS medications and
grants for constructing and staffing medical clinics (www.keepachildalive.org).
John Denver’s Plant-It 2020 plants, maintains, and protects indigenous trees
in forests and urban areas all over the world (www.plantit2020.org).
Preserving Family Images
Scan photos, negatives, and slides to create CDs and DVDs of everyone’s
favorites. You can do this yourself, or you can have professionals complete
the process for you. If you package up your photographs, negatives, and
slides, you can send them off to ScanCafe (www.ScanCafe.com)
where technicians will manually scan and retouch all of your photos and post
them in a secure online library for you to view. You don’t even have to
pre-sort the images. ScanCafe will charge you only for the images you wish
to keep (with a minimum fifty percent commitment). After selecting the
images you wish to keep, you will be returned all the original photos along
with a CD or DVD of your digital images.
ScanCafe will perform touch ups like color correction, cropping, and dust
and stain removal. Additional services include black and white negative and
slide scanning and more extensive restoration for severely damaged images.
This is a great way to preserve your family or friendship images forever,
and not only does it make a memorable holiday gift, it is a gift that keeps
on giving.
Gift Certificates
Buy a set number of sessions at a local massage therapist, and arrange with
the therapist to have prepaid “relaxation reminders” sent throughout the
year. Another possibility is to award a “good for one free massage”
certificate with yourself as the hands-on healer.
Another gift certificate possibility is to arrange with your favorite
florist to send a fresh bouquet on a preselected occasion every month. Even
mix in balloons, fruit baskets, and stuffed toys.
Mystery “surprise” gift certificates might ask recipients to clear their
calendar for one day or weekend every month. Anticipation, of course, can
work magic. One day, or weekend, each month plan a surprise that might
include tickets to see an entertainer or theatrical production, a balloon
ride, a surprise weekend getaway at Lake Tahoe or Branson, Missouri, or a
sunset, dinner cruise on a local lake or river.
There could be “Good Health Gift Certificates” as well which would include
pre-paid visits to a family physician, dentist, dermatologist, podiatrist,
gynecologist, or other health professional. It could be, too, to pay for
insulin, high blood pressure medication, or other life-saving drugs.
Gift certificates could be given for a free day at the spa, for the full
treatment at a local beauty salon, for a trial membership at the local gym,
or to purchase groceries at the local health food store. How about adding a
personal touch for someone you love, and give them a gift certificate for a
mammogram, eye exam, or prostate screening that you will attend with them?
It is true that all of these are practical, utilitarian suggestions. We
cannot give gifts of inner joy or lifelong peace, but we can wish others a
lifetime filled with joy and peace and whether wrapped in gold-leaf paper
and tied up in bows or not, these may be the real gifts that keep on giving.
back to page top
>
Dear Mom and Dad: Lives and then some
>
A fourth grade perspective on the world
>
Gifts that keep on giving
>
Reasons why the Law of Attraction (LOA) is a myth
>
The first anniversary of posted essays
Reasons why the Law of Attraction (LOA) is a myth
by Richard L. Weaver II, PhD
I was reading Christine Comaford-Lynch’s
book, Rules for Renegades: How to Make More Money, Rock Your Career, and
Revel in Your Individuality (McGraw-Hill, 2007), and I came to her “Ten
Steps to Your GSD (Gets Stuff Done)” (pp. 46-50), and I read her sixth
suggestion, “Log on to the Law of Attraction” (LOA). In her explanation of
this step, Comaford-Lynch writes, “I live by a very cool rule in the
universe called the LOA. You’ve heard the saying ‘What you focus on, you
become.’ That’s the idea of the LOA.” Comaford-Lynch continues, “When you
develop a clear idea of what you want, focus on it, and feel good about it,
your mind will consider your wishes to be marching orders.” Her next
sentence is the one that causes concern: “The universe will conspire to help
to make your dreams come true.”
I will return to her last comment about the universe’s participation in the
process in a moment. Before that, however, you need a brief history of the
LOA.
The following historical notes are taken directly from Wikipedia and are
used here without quotation marks for ease of reading. The LOA concept can
be found in Hinduism. The most influential modern book on the subject is As
a Man Thinketh by James Allen (1864-1912), which was published in 1902. The
title derives from the ancient Jewish Book of Proverbs, chapter 23, verse 7:
"As a man thinketh in his heart, so he is." By the mid 20th century,
writings on the subject had become common and dozens of authors had
addressed the topic under various names, such as positive thinking, "mental
science," "pragmatic Christianity," "New Thought," "practical metaphysics,"
“Science of Mind," and "Religious Science.” In 2006, a film titled The
Secret presented the LOA to a new generation; soon after it developed into a
book by the same name.
The comments in the remaining portion of this essay are not designed to cast
aspersions upon or disparage, in any way, those who believe in the power of
positive thinking, use visualization, say positive affirmations to boost
their spirits and guide their actions, or have anecdotal proof that the LOA
works in their own or others’ lives. According to Wikipedia, once again,
“many people who accept the LOA as a guide for right living do so on the
basis of their faith in the Universe and The Universe's 'Laws'; thus, to
them, the nature of the 'Law' is not one to be settled scientifically, and
the word 'Law' carries the same belief-based weight as non-scientific 'Laws'
from other religions.” People with these beliefs are unlikely to be swayed
by any reasons against the LOA. The purpose of this essay is to show that
the LOA is a myth.
Although the definition of the LOA varies greatly, what I am talking about
here is the LOA as a theory that “like attracts like” and as applied to the
mental life of human beings, suggests that individuals experience in their
lives actions and events that correspond to their thoughts, feelings, and
words. What this reveals is that believing in the LOA means those
individuals have the ability to control the reality of their lives through
thought alone.
My first two reasons come from the website of
Scott H. Young. The first argument that LOA is a myth is the problem of
calling it a law. It is a completely unscientific theory. For something to
be called a “law” in science, it must have predictive powers. Evolution is a
theory because theories explain; laws predict.
The second reason is that the LOA is impotent. It lacks any basis from which
to disprove it. Not only does this render it unscientific but lacking in
power as well. For advice to be worthwhile, there must be ways to determine
if it is working, and the LOA fails. Often the way it is discussed and
presented makes it sound scientific; it is pseudoscience and nothing more.
The third reason is that it is a self-proving concept. That is, if the LOA
doesn’t work for you, it is for the same reason as why it works. If positive
things happen in your life because you believe in them that proves the LOA.
If positive things happen during a time in your life when you are convinced
nothing remotely positive could happen or negative things happen when you
are 100% convinced they wouldn’t, that would disprove the LOA and cause you
to reject it.
The fourth reason is that the LOA is a myth because it simply mimics, and
offers little that is new, to the way life works without the LOA. For
example, if you went out in traffic looking for red cars, you’ll see many.
Your senses are filters, as is your brain, so if you focus on a particular
wavelength of stuff, it should be no surprise that you’ll get it. It
requires no extraordinary mental jump to the conclusion that life works like
that all the time — whatever you focus on, you’ll see more of it, or get
more of it. This has nothing to do with the universe conspiring to help you
in any way. The universe is simply the aggregate of all existing things.
The fifth reason is that the LOA requires a leap of faith. Comaford-Lynch,
for example, puts her faith in an active universe that will conspire to help
her. For anyone who believes in the LOA, they will see what they want to
see. Many who claim belief in the LOA, or cite personal evidence of its
success, are healthy, wealthy, full of joy and love, and the LOA works
perfectly. But it works as well for the bitter, depressed, and frustrated
who see the world as a horrible place. Their world, too, is the way it is
because they think it is that way.
The sixth reason is that the LOA leads people to believe in a wishing well
or magic genie. They think by wishing for things hard enough, they will get
them. It’s like playing the lottery and doing nothing because when the
lottery pays off, you will be successful. It takes more than wishing — and
certainly more than waiting for a lottery payout — to make any dream come
true. Do you really believe that thinking hard enough about anything will
make it come true?
The seventh reason is a question: Do you believe in coincidence, or when
random events take place, do you feel they mean something greater?
The eighth reason is that the LOA provides people with the illusion of
having control over their lives. Change your attitudes and intentions and
any dream you have will come true. If it doesn’t work, it’s your fault
because you didn’t genuinely change your attitude or intentions. The LOA is
no less a way toward control than faith is a basis for being healed. When
you don’t get healed, faith healers will tell you, you simply didn’t have
enough faith!
Many people believe in the LOA, especially big name self-help gurus. The LOA
is not a proven law of nature, and people do not attract everything in their
lives. It is how you think about events and information and the concrete
actions you take that give you control of your life. To be healthy and happy
you must build your self-esteem, be positive and optimistic, have an open
mind, and take action when necessary to make positive changes in your life.
There is far better advice in these two sentences than anything the LOA has
to offer, and now you have eight reasons to support this view.
back to page top
>
Dear Mom and Dad: Lives and then some
>
A fourth grade perspective on the world
>
Gifts that keep on giving
>
Reasons why the Law of Attraction (LOA) is a myth
>
The first anniversary of posted essays
The first anniversary of posted essays
by Richard L. Weaver II, PhD
This week is the first anniversary of
the blog essays. This essay represents the completion of 52 posted essays.
For me, it is both a celebration and a surprise. It is wonderful to know
that that many essays have been written and posted. The surprise comes
because the time went by so quickly. When I first began posting essays, I
asked my son (my webmaster) two questions: Will it be possible to write one
essay per week? And, if I find the burden too great, can we stop it at any
time? The quick response to both questions was, “Yes.”
What was the initial reason for
establishing the blog? Just over one year ago The (Toledo) Blade, because of
the retirement of Tom Walton, the editor, discontinued the “Saturday Essay”
feature that he had created to celebrate local writers, politicians,
administrators, and anyone else who had ideas to share with the community.
If you want to return and read the early correspondence I had with David
Shutt, the new editorial director, go back to the blog dated
September 15, 2007. For me, with 14 published essays, the “Saturday
Essay” feature had become both an outlet and a source of entertainment and
information, but it was no longer available.
back to page top
>
Dear Mom and Dad: Lives and then some
>
A fourth grade perspective on the world
>
Gifts that keep on giving
>
Reasons why the Law of Attraction (LOA) is a myth
>
The first anniversary of posted essays
|
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